Labour Part 2: The Journey of Natural Birth

At 2:30am I was at peace when I saw Veronica, the midwife, and lay down on the king size be, at Genesis Clinic, with the contraction monitor attached to me. The room was dim and mom and Avon watched as each contraction passed. I felt very awkward on the bed because the major pain was in my lower back and the bed didn’t give me many options for positions. Then the midwife checked how far my cervix was dilated. I was shocked to find that I was already 7cm dilated. Mom gave me the thumbs up and said“wow, that is impressive Kanya.” But I didn’t know quite how to take it as I couldn’t quite measure the level of pain I was experiencing to a mere 7cm on a ruler. Then I tried to think of how the next 3cm will be and beyond…..I was battling to figure out how these next 3cm would unfold.

The midwife asked where I would like to give birth, on the bed or in the tub. I knew this question would come but honestly I didn’t have an exact answer. I never had a exact birthing plan I actually avoided the thought all together. I guess I was trying to save myself of freaking out before the actual event. As I was about to say ..”the bed”….a really bad contraction came and I said “Lets try the bath!”

As soon as I got into the warm deep birthing tub I automatically relaxed. My mom said she had never seen someone so relaxed before at this stage of labour. I remember cracking jokes and posing for a photo in the labour tub as if I wasn’t just about to go into one of the most painful experiences in my life. I guess my approach was …might as well enjoy myself while I am sane.



3am everyone all happy - kanya, Avon and Veronica (midwife)

  My contractions progressively got more intense and both Mom and Avon supported my head out of the water by holding my arms through each one. It was funny because when I wasn’t having a contraction I was so at peace that I would fall asleep - out cold. Then I would wake up and realise “Gosh I am in labour!” and would grab mom and Avon as if I could pull them into the tub with both my hands. Apparently I dug my nails deep into Mom and Avon. Good thing I didn’t panic when I woke up. It was as if my body was in complete relaxation for the upcoming contraction.

My Midwife was beyond amazing. She was so peaceful and calm through out my labour. Avon said that when he saw her he knew I was in the right hands. I guess midwives have seen it all, so this was nothing to her. When my contractions got almost unbearable I asked her what I should do. She calmly said “Kanya your body is going to tell you exactly what to do, just listen to it!” When she said that I thought “How in the hell am I going to listen to my body …..my ears are already my body! How would I know what my body is saying?” But now that I am typing this blog, the midwife’s advice was probably the best advice I got throughout the intense labour. She was right - my body did tell me exactly what to do. It was the strangest experience because the body just went into a mind of its own. My body would say: “Kanya you need to vomit RIGHT NOW!” and I would shouted “Pass me the bowl QUICK!” as I threw up my water automatically broke. It was a popping sound and I could see it in the water. Thankfully it wasn’t discoloured because if it was it would indicate that Siam was stressed. Then my body would say “PUSH Kanya, push like you have never pushed before, push like your life depended on it!” I was listening and I was pushing instinctively. But my body was also doing its own thing which I had no control over. It wasn’t like I could tell my body “Body lets take a longer break…I am not ready for the next contraction!” Oh no! this body of mine was in top baby delivery mode and was doing exactly what it was designed to do.

Not only was my body in tune for delivery but so was Siam. It was so strange because I was beginning to realise that this part of me had a mind of its own. Siam knew exactly what to do and every now and then the midwife would check heart rate. Knowing that Siam’s heart rate was fine really geared me forward. I kept telling myself this was normal these pains are natural and I was designed for this very moment. I never let a bad thought enter my mind. I also needed my spirit to be fully engaged and when the contractions and pushing felt beyond unbelievable I just focused on the light above me and shouted “LORD HELP ME NOW!!!!! HELP ME NOW LORD!” It was the only thing I could think of to say. Screaming didn’t help, crying didn’t help….but I knew if I put my trust in something greater than me then I would get through this. Having my mother in the room was also soothing to my spirit. Her spirit was so calm and compassionate that words didn’t need to be exchanged her presence was enough.

You are probably wondering where Avon was through it all. Well he was right behind me holding my shoulders up and cooling me off with a wet towel. During the labour I briefly wondered if he was okay seeing me like this. But when the head started crowning I realised how fully present he was. He was like a softly spoken soccer commentator saying “Baby you are doing great, I can see the head, keep pushing, only a little bit more to go!!!!” I couldn’t look down at the whole episode that was happening down there. Avon’s commentating was more than enough encouragement for me.

1. Kanya keeping focused before a contraction; 2. Kanya facial expression during a push (notice Avons shirt is nearly being ripped) 3. Parents overwhelming sense of joy straight after delivery.

What did it fee like? Well it really did feel like I was taking a huge Dump! As if I was so constipated and the hole was not big enough. The only difference with constipation and delivery is that there was no coming back later to try again. ……You had to PUSH it out no matter what.

But Wow when Siam came out it was like someone switched off the pain button and my Body, Mind and Spirit were back as one. I had a huge rush of emotions as the midwife put Siam on my chest. I cried and said “Well done Siam you were listening to mommy!” Siam was calmed at the sound of my voice which was extremely moving. Mom reminded me of the words I said “Siam I love you I love you and I don’t even know what you are.” The midwife said look for yourself and I gently picked Siams slippery body up and saw Siam was a Girl and she was so beautiful. Her lips were a deep red, her eyes were wide open to the world and her hair was soft wet curls. I was really awe struck by her presence, this life came from within me and it all felt so unreal.

At 5:50am, 29th September the umbilical cord was cut and SIAM was now Kayla Eva Middleton. Avon was given the honour of cutting the cord and an overwhelming rush of love come over me as I realised that this was a real life which God has blessed us with. The cutting of the cord not only symbolised the beginning of Kayla’s life but it also symbolised the beginning of parenthood. At that specific moment I was no longer pregnant, our married life would no longer be Avon and I, we were now a family and life form here on end will have a whole different dimension to it.

1. Mom calming Kayla in the water, 2. Avon, Veronica, Kayla and Kanya......WE DID IT

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Overall Perspective of the experience:

Readers I would do give natural birth over and over again :). I have never experienced such a closeness to God, myself and to my husband. It almost felt supernatural. My faith was really put to the test just by knowing that God created me for this very moment and that he would bring me through it. Also finding that strength from within has made me feel that now I can do anything! Giving birth naturally made me fall in love with my husband all over again just through his support and encouragement. I thought I would shout at him and curse him but all I could do was hold on to him. After it all Avon just said "Wow I thought I loved you before this whole experience, but now that love is that much more intense." All these factors have encouraged me for the next phase of life - Motherhood……..I will be sure to keep you all posted through this blog .

7am am familly photo