~The Unexpected Angels~

There are people who come into your life who you would have never thought would impact you….but they do. And there are people who you would have probably never have encountered but then life puts you into a situation that creates a bond between the two of you that would have never been there before. Well this is a blog about how God used the least expected people to change ....I call them the Angels in life. This blog is a dedication to my friend Tania for Lupus Awareness day, May 10,2011.

This journey all started when I met Piet-louis and Althea during the Graduate orientation week at the University of Waterloo. They were a South African couple starting their PHD in the same Department as me. Piet-louis was a typically structured Afrikaans man, and if you don’t know what that looks like – big boned, rounded tummy, strong opinionated kind of guy. At first appearance I thought “Lord of all the people you could have sent from South Africa, why Afrikaners!” Yes that was probably racist of me but where I came from a majority of Afrikaners were perceived as racist themselves and stuck to their own kind. So really it was almost like “I don’t like them because most of them don’t like us (people of colour!)”…so I thought.

Piet-louis was probably the first person I had ever introduced myself to – as a Christian….or as he said “Sister in Christ!” When he knew I was a Christian his face lit up with excitement and he proudly introduced me to his wife Althea. They didn’t know it at the time but for me the whole introduction as a Christian wasn’t natural to me. I was more an under cover Christian, who prayed in silence and spoke my mind in private. But after this meeting it all changed as our friendship developed into a whole prayer group that met once a week at their home. Through them I learnt so much about trusting God and also realised the sin in me! After 8 months it was like we had been friends since birth. To the point that, I was travelled to South Africa to meet them there and see what opportunities could come up for my master’s research.

Althea, Piet-louis, Amy, Rene and cousins

Piet-louis, Althea and their two kids welcomed me to South Africa. I had one week to sort myself out while with them. Yup one week to get the research position, find a place to live, organise a car, find my way around ect. Through prayer everything happened like a miracle – Piet-louis and Althea loaned me their car because they were going back to Canada, I got funding through Piet-louis work he did with Maccaferri, South Africa.  Piet-louis also introduced me to a family friend called Tania, who offered her spare bedroom to me for rent for the 4 months I was in South Africa.

Living with Tania was how I found out about the disease Lupus. Now Tania was a couple of years older than I was and was also very much Afrikaans.  She was diagnosed with Lupus around about the age I was at the time. I had never heard of such a decease but Lupus is (aka SLE) is a chronic, incurable, potentially life-threatening, auto-immune disorder, whereby the body’s defence mechanisms ‘attack’ itself. It is not contagious, but genetic and affects mostly women between the ages of 14-50; however, the illness can occur in men, newborn infants, children and the elderly.

As the months went on Tania and I became really good friends and I witnessed the true effects of this disease and it baffled me. All of a sudden the stresses of my life really appeared to be insignificant compared to what she was going through. She was such a hard worker and extremely clever but some days her body just wouldn’t want to get out of bed. You see Lupus mainly attacks the joints, skin, lungs, kidney, heart, blood vessels, liver and nervous system. Tania would tell me that some days she would lie in bed and command her body to function eg. tell her legs – you better start moving coz we have work to do! Her body would get internal bruises out of no where no bump or anything just a bruise that would appear. She would fear using her sick days because she was afraid there would be a time she would really need them. So she pushed and worked herself harder than any other employee.

One night we sat up and watched a movie about a lady who was trying to fight cancer. The movie ended so well with her being able to fight the cancer and eventually have children. I just blurted out “wow isn’t that great!” but I didn’t realise that Tania had got emotional with the movie. She said to me “Sometimes I wish I had cancer!” That really put her disease into perspective for me. She was wishing she could have cancer because there could be a chance that she could get cured and could eventually have a child… yet with Lupus there was no cure and children were not an option. I was shocked. 

Tania still smiling when I visited her in hospital

The real traumatic moment for me was when she went through a period of illness known as ‘flares’ and she got admitted to hospital. Just before I walked into her hospital room I listened to the doctor explaining what was going on inside her. The doctor drew a diagram illustrating that her whole oesophagus, tummy and intestines were raw/damaged! My tummy turned at the thought of the pain she could be experiencing. But when we sat and chatted she cried, not about the pain but the fact that she couldn’t go to an event with her friend that night. You see the part of her suffering that hurt her most wasn’t the sickness but how it affected her friendships and her ability to live a normal life. Something a lot of us take for granted each day.

Nyemu, Kanya, Tania, Mom in Tania's 

apartment

Living with Tania really shed light on the true essence of life! She would say we are all going to die at some point…..God told me when I was going to die and I will live and cherish each day and every friendship till then. Tania was such a strong Christian and never doubted herself and Gods purpose over her life. Even when I asked here would you have wanted to have wished this disease away? She explained she found something inside of herself that she would not have been able to have found if she didn't go through with this experience. I visited her church and as we sang pure Afrikaans hymns I really felt Gods presence. I stood there singing in my new Afrikaans accent and looked around at all the Afrikaans faces and thought "Lord you have opened up my eyes and heart to things I never thought I needed changing or stirring up! You put Tania and the Grundling family into my life like unexpected Angels......Thank you!"

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Living with Tania ignited a real self reflection - could I continue to live if this happened to me, would I still be able to serve and trust my mighty God? Why do bad things happen to good people? Well these are also some of the questions my pastor asked himself when he was battling with cancer! If you are interested in answers, we start a new series this week called “Why do Bad Things happen” and it hopes to answer some of these heart struck questions.. go to  www.godfirst.co.za  (click resources) for each video preach.