Kayla is 11 months
and I am Pregnant!
Finding out I was pregnant the second time around was a lot
less extravagant than when I had Kayla. I mean there were no tear jerking
moments or moments when my heart skipped a beat, I wasn’t exactly jumping for
joy when I shared it with people either. Don’t get me wrong I was very thankful
to God that I was pregnant but there were numerous factors why the level of
excitement during this second round of pregnancy was a lot different.
Firstly, by the time I had found out I was pregnant it had
only been a couple of months since Kayla had stopped breast feeding and I was
finally feeling like my body was now my own again. Not that I didn’t mind
sharing my body, I actually really enjoyed it. But after I had reached the 6
month mark I was really starting to feel chained to Kayla by the boob. At 6 months
Kayla was still waking up for that midnight snack at the boob and I was still
trekking the breast pump everywhere I went. But the real moment when I knew the
BOOB relationship had to stop was when I was hanging over a public toilet, in
the Cape Town Airport, manually trying to release the pressure in my
breast. The thought of being on a 2 hour
flight with a fully loaded set of boobs traumatized me. Yes it was at that
point when I knew Mommy had to stop breastfeeding. After the whole process of
weaning Kayla off the boob, my body had miraculously reshaped back to pre-baby,
and my female organs seemed to have found themselves again. YEY! ….and then
this somewhat faded strip on the home pregnancy test showed up and it got me
thinking “God are you for real!” The second factor that pinched at my excitement levels was the whole fact that I finally felt like I had an opportunity to give my career a chance. To move with full steam and embrace every aspect of it and when I was pregnant with Kayla – career was the last thing on my mind. I was fearful that this pregnancy might bring along with it the whole lack of career drive. I really thought God had opened doors for me now and this pregnancy seemed like He was trying to tell me something else – What? Because I had barely even sunken my teeth into this career burger.
Thirdly, there was the thought of what would people think
when they see how close Kayla and Baby #2 are? But that faded quite quickly
when I was being helped by the pharmacist and a lady behind me asked if she
could butt in with a quick question.
The lady asked anxiously: Excuse me, can I take these pills
if I am breastfeeding and pregnant?
Pharmacist: Well which one are you?
Lady: I am both! (as if her question was an obvious one.)
Enter Kanya: May I ask how old your baby is?
Lady: 6 months!
Kanya: Mine is 11 months and I might be pregnant too!
But my mind was really saying “WHOOP WHOOP!!!! Take that all
you judgmental people, there are ladies out there who have much closer gaps
than me! So HA!”
Fourthly I think the fact that I was pregnant again did
shake Avon’s anxiety levels a bit. All
of a sudden the two bedroom place we were living in was clearly going to be way
too small, so we decided to do the house shop. I think that just increased our
anxiety levels because houses around Fourways, Johannesburg were way over what
we could afford. Ouch!
Although it felt like this pregnancy was really coming at an awkward time I knew Gods hand was in it all, I felt blessed to be pregnant again and has no moments of wishing I wasn't pregnant...just moments of reflections.....But I had so much to be excited about with being pregnant ....coming up next blog!
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